Money can't buy this.

Okay so, people have decided the zombie outbreak has started because a bunch of stupid cunts are going crazy.

Most recently, a man was found naked eating a man’s face (I’m not kidding) and took as many as seven pistol shots before he dropped. It was later discovered he was absurdly high on LSD and quite possibly had no idea what he was doing nor that he had been shot at all. (before he died that is.)

People doing crazy shot doesn’t mean zombies are coming. People have been doing stupid crazy shit for a long time and will continue to for a long time to come.

Sorry to burst your bubbles.

I don’t have a job.
I don’t have a license.
I am irresponsible.
I am a nerd.
I am lazy.
I am horrendously unfit.
I don’t exercise regularly. 
I can eat my weight in KFC.
I am not vegetarian or vegan.
I am picky.
I am socially awkward.


I am not sorry for any of it.

Wherever did you get that idea from?!

Someone tell me what I want tattoo’d on me.